Females Are Strong As Hell - Thoughts For International Women's Day

The library opening at the Hopes For Women Centre in Gaza Palestinian refugee camp, Jordan. September 2018

“Females are strong as hell.” –The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt

I was at the gym the other day. A woman got on a machine next to mine and had her mask around her mouth. I asked her to pull up her mask; I am an employee of the gym, so I need to make sure people are following the rules. She pulled her mask all the way down, called me a foul name, and shook her head. I honestly couldn’t believe her hostility. 

This moment made me think through how we treat each other as women. So often we view each other as competition or a threat. We are jealous of another women’s beauty or body or career or husband or children or life. Many times, we inflate our own accomplishments or lord our own beauty over other women so we can feel superior or special. Because somehow this makes us confident in ourselves. We can just be so hateful to other women.

I have had other women make me feel insecure about how I live my life or how I look. Like I am below them. I have allowed this comparison game we play with each other to lower my self-esteem. I’ve also been lucky enough to be surrounded by women who cheer each other on and bring out the best in each other. Women who believe in me and bring out the best in me. I hope I do the same for them. 

In the Middle East, I have the unique privilege of working with women. Not because it’s what I am supposed to do. When I first started in Beirut years ago, it was assumed that I, as a single woman, would work with other women and children only. It was appropriate and modest for the culture. 

Over the years, I have worked with Arab men and have sometimes been allowed into the “good ole boy’s club.” I have many men-friends in the Middle East, no not that kind, you know bros, so to speak. I have deep friendships with them, trust them implicitly, and have enjoyed working with them. Some are just good friends who support the work I do by giving me a place to stay or driving me around or just checking in to make sure I am doing well. I know this challenges your stereotypes of Arab men, but I found them, mostly, to be respectful, über-supportive, and protective of me. 

I choose to focus work primarily on women, not because I have to, but because I want to. I want to invest and lift up other women as other women have done for me. Especially women facing unique challenges of being stateless. When you are stateless, you do not fall under the protection of any country, and the basic human rights that we may take for granted are not accessible, such as healthcare, employment, and education. 

After 17 years of working in the Middle East, I have found that women are the ones to get shit done. Refugee women get shit done. They literally find a way out of nothingness to help their communities. Women intrinsically know that the wellbeing of their community directly affects their family and their own lives. I have found women work well together to accomplish tasks, particularly when they feel valued individually and as a group. 

A few years ago, I was at a Women’s Centre in one camp. A cake had been bought, and they planned a celebration. One volunteer graduated from college with her degree. Quite a significant accomplishment for a woman who is a refugee. I watched as the other women, most much older and without an education, celebrated and were ecstatic for her. I think they all felt like they gained a degree through their support of her. They did it together. 

It is one of my great joys to support Palestinian women and see their accomplishments. I know my citizenship affords me opportunities. That’s the difference between us, doors do not open for them as they do me. How do I use my citizenship, privilege, and the rights it allows to make sure others have opportunities? To ensure others live in dignity and achieve their dreams? How do I build equity for other women? 

March 8th is International Women’s Day. It is a day to celebrate the achievements of women globally whether that be social, economic, cultural, and political. This year’s theme is “Together for an equal tomorrow, today.” I love this so much. Equality is possible if we join together.

For the month of March, we will feature a Palestinian woman every week. Many are refugees, some are Palestinian women using their rights to fight for the rights of refugees. It’s important you know them and realize the incredible work they are doing for themselves, their families, and communities.

We will also fundraise in March to support a mental health and wellness program for refugee women. Our partner in Jordan, Hopes For Women in Education has identified the need for this after a difficult pandemic year filled with job losses, food insecurity, inadequate healthcare, illness, and a recent death of a staff member. The past year has taken a toll on them. Women are silently suffering with anxiety. 

$3,000 will support a series of workshops facilitated by a counselor to help them process their grief and give tools to move forward. We are committed to holistically supporting Palestinian refugee women during this pandemic, including their mental health. I also know that a community is only as healthy as its leaders, by supporting women in leadership, we are helping the community. 

Will you join us in honoring and supporting Palestinian refugee women for the month of March? Follow us on social media to learn more and go to our GIVE PAGE to donate to the Hopes Mental Health and Wellness Project. 

Share their stories with your networks and make them known! 

Together for an equal tomorrow, today!